Date: 22nd May 2010

Mood: Complicated.

Gosh it has been so long since I've been updating here. I should update soon but time seems to run out everyday of my life. Anyways, I shall update more soon. I'm going to have my exams in a week. Damn. I'm not ready at all. But of course being me, I linger around doing nothing anyway. That's just me. I will only start when it is really really close to the day. haha. I have got to change that. Haih. I'll be making a very very big decision that will determine my future after this exam. I feel so stupid but I know if I don't do it, I'll spend my life regretting about it everyday of my life.

I do not what is wrong and right anymore. I should start brainstorming of pros and cons of my decision soon. Oh boy, my life is so complicated.

Anyways, I'll update more soon I promise :)

Critical Acclaim

Some people just don't know how to keep their mouths shut for their own sake. And it is damn right annoying.

Shh be quiet you might piss somebody off.

Like me motherfucker you've been at it for too long.

While you feed off others insecurities,

you stand in front off me and bite the hand that feeds.

Exactly. That is how I feel towards you dumbass.

Please shut the fuck up.

Just because you don't have a life, don't ruin mine.

See. There is a day in every person's live where you'd wish you're someone else. It might be your nemesis (ironically), it might be your friend, or it might just be someone you know but not close to. I call it the "emo in corner" feeling :) There are always reasons behind it. It doesn't appear just like that.

I have this moments a lot of time. Most of this feeling comes from the feeling envy. I won't deny that, I'm not a hypocrite. Wishing I'm someone else is normal. Its not everyday that I felt it. But right at this moment I do :)

Some people are just plain lucky. I wish I am too. Unfortunately no.

Some people don't have to do anything to get the attention from people they love.

Some people just have to say it to get what they want.

Some people won't get what they desire for even if they beg.

Some people have everything done their way and people around them are more than glad to just follow their commands. So lucky.

But I know the feeling would go away after a while. The feeling of envy and wanting to be someone else. After the feeling's gone, you're back to normal and life goes on.

The point is there might be a breaking point in your life, but it will pass by.

Somehow.. It's just a matter of time.

Time will heal everything. OR SLEEP!

Sleep is like the best thing in the whole world! It makes you forget :)

Oh well, I'm just having one of my usual break downs. I'll be okay by a few hours hopefully :)

Signing off,

Aainaa Hadi

sick and tired

im sick
im aware of it
im aware that i need help
but i dont think i want any

im not okay

No Whine Zone

Whiner. Complainer. Fault-finder. Moaner. Knocker. Nit-picker. Whinger.

Whatever you call it, I am it, or rather I was.
I learnt to not ever be THAT anymore. I vowed myself to not complain about petty little things that bother me anymore.
I apologise for being so whiny about everything too much, believe me I don't intend to do so.
People make mistakes

So yeah, its hard to hear me complain that much in real life except for one thing :P my girls would know :D
But other than that, I only do it here so I guess this is ok and Im deleting my old post cause I'm too embarassed of it. hahah. I was stupid. The only reason I was mad is because I hate selfish people. I am really the kind of person who'd actually put up with people's behavior. I'm actually quite a push over. Scratch that. I'm such a push-over.
EXCEPT while dealing with SELFISH people. I hate selfish people.
So yeah, forgive my whinings :)

I promise to be a better person from now on :)
and I promise to do my very best in creating a Whine Free Zone here :D

randomness

I was ransacking through my ipod notes for random stuff and guess what i found?
A note from Belinda 20 days ago. It's supposed to be a note to myself from me, like a diary entry.

Dear diary,

Today Belinda took my ipod and started raping it. I think my ipod liked Belinda's personal touch cause Belinda is so awesome like Snoop Dogg.

Belinda is tall like Snoop Dogg and she can drop it like its hot like Snoop Dogg. But her boyfriend refuses to call her Snoop Dogg. Aina which is me, the person writing this entry, also refuses to call her Snoop Dogg. Why is that so? Why so I not want to call her Snoop Dogg? Its so weird. I'm so weird.

Yes, she wrote that on MY ipod and she called me weird. She can be cuckoo sometimes. But we love her :)
She's so adorable and tad random. Shes as random as Chuck Norris. There you go. hahah.
I miss her ranting. lol
I miss them, miss our chianghua-ing sessions everyday where we'll talk non-stop until people would shush us for being too loud. *as if we care* :) because when we're together, we forget the world and live the moment :) that's how random stuff appear. hahah

p/s: Belinda, stop raping my ipod. It doesnt like rapings. and Hilda, you know I miss you like hell and I love you C:

I Hate Days Like This

I feel like an ass again today. haih.

I need him. I need to talk to him, but that seems impossible.

Really, times like this all I need is him.

He'll make me feel better

Cause I dont need the world, forget the world, all I need is you baby.

Mika's Rain is the most suitable song for the occasion.

Is it really necessary

Every single day

Making me more ordinary

In every possible way

This ordinary mind is broken

You did it and you don’t even know

Leaving me with words unspoken

You better get back cuz I’m ready for...

More than this

Whatever it isBaby,

I hate days like this

Caught in a trap

I can't look back

Baby I hate days like this